A-100 Nerves

We’re sitting at T-2 days until packout, T-3 until moving, and my nerves are pretty frayed. We’ve got just about everything done that I can think of, but the waiting is driving me nuts. I think I’m past the “what if something goes wrong and it doesn’t happen?” jitters, and have moved squarely on to the “What if I can’t hack it?” and “What if I hate it?” worries.

The biggest sub-worry is about leaving all of my friends and family. I have friends in DC, and I always do well at making friends (like when I moved here from my hometown), but there is still some concern, especially with the numerous times I will be moving. (I’m going to need to get a good air miles credit card, though, for all the people I plan on bringing to visit me while I’m abroad!)

I think the nerves are getting to all of us. The Teacher is sleeping lots, and our poor cat just seems pissy. (Of course, two moves in the last two months were already hard on him.)

Also, I’m irrationally afraid of how early work will be. I’ve done 9-5 (well, 8:30-4:30) jobs before, but it’s been awhile. Having to be at work at 7:45, when I’m usually still asleep, kind of worries me. I’m trying to practice by getting up at 6 every morning, and I can do it, but it’s leaving me pretty drained every day.

At the same time, I’m also finally looking at the blogs of other FSO’s and FSO’s to be. So much of it seems cool; other parts seem stressful. As I mentioned to some friends, seeing the others who have applied and been turned down reminded me how blessed I am to get in, and to have the Teacher (and our cat!) by my side.


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